God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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