i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Randomize
