yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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