The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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