Dual....:-)
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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