making cat noises will not fix the situation.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Randomize
