I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
