Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize