elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
