gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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