I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
