Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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