I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
