i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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