remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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