You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
