Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Randomize
