I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
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