ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
