I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Randomize
