I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
