Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
