Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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