I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
