Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Holy shit dude........stairs
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
