That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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