I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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