your thong is hanging out like whoa
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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