You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
i think i have two assholes
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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