He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Randomize
