Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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