She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
