This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
