I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
