I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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