And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
