About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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