I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
this will be a night to untag.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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