he thought i was a dude.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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