Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Randomize
