Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
