You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
