I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Randomize