But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
