Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
