this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Randomize
