I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
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