Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Randomize
