DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
