my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Randomize
